As most of you know, Tim has several siblings who cannot, for whatever reason, conceive. We have a total of six nieces and nephews who are adopted. Adoption has proven to be an incredibly costly and political endeavor for most. Jody and Erik, who adopted five from China and Vietnam, had to wait for long undetermined lengths of time before selected and then they had to bring a large amount of "gifts" (read: bribes) with them for the orphanages and judges in order for their new children to be released to them. Todd and Amy have an open adoption, meaning that the birth mom and her family visit Oliver regularly and are a big part of their life. They even celebrate "Birth Mom Day" the day before Mothers Day with the birth mom. It works for them, but they made that choice in order to increase their odds of getting picked. Because of Todds stroke five years ago, they have been disqualified from adopting by any conventional means. They have become foster parents with the distant hope that they might be able to make one of these children permanent members of their family. They have come very close to getting two daughters once, but the birth father stepped in last minute and made his claim. Whether this is for the better or worse, we will never know. Many years ago, Jenny and Carl learned that they too, could not bear children. They signed up and paid all their dues for the LDS adoption services. They went to all the advisers and did all they were instructed to do to sell themselves as the best potential parents. That's how it works. If a birth mom picks you out of all the rest of the online profiles, you might be lucky enough to welcome a new baby into your home, if birth mom doesn't change her mind.
Well, Jenny and Carl tried this for several years and got fed up, so they too decided that fostering children would be better than having no children in their home at all. Two years ago, on July 25th, they were given guardianship over Tilly (14 months) and Molly (25 months). These past two years have been full of visits with the birth mom and court appearances. Birth mom was determined unfit to have her children back after a long long process. The birth mom has had a total of five children. The older three were removed from her care and adopted by another family long ago. Once the birth mom was seen as unfit, the parents of the first three decided that they wanted to adopt these other two girls as well. Interestingly enough, they were initially offered to foster the girls before Jenny and Carl were, but they did not want to because they did not want any more children. So, once Jenny and Carl petitioned for adoption, there is a thirty day waiting period to see if there is anyone else who wants to adopt them (like grandparents, fathers, aunts or uncles,...parents of the siblings). During this time the parents of the siblings petitioned for the adoption of the girls as well. The past year has been full of court dates trying to determine who would be better parents for these girls; the parents of the siblings (keep the blood related siblings together) or Jenny and Carl who have been raising them. It is a tough call. Can you imagine raising two children, knowing at anytime they could be taken from you forever? For two whole years with that knowledge hanging over you??
We just learned that on August 7th these two girls will be legally adopted by Jenny and Carl. On August 9th they will be sealed as a family for time and all eternity! I am so happy for these four. They have been through so much. Though these past two years have been fraught with trials, they have experienced boundless blessings and are finally adding those "missing pieces of their family puzzle" (as they say :).
(I don't have a picture to show you, because these two girls were foster children, Jenny and Carl were not allowed to share any.)
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